Make Holy Week Holy to the Lord

When I've been out of town for a week, I usually go into Monday morning like a wild woman. So, this morning has started with much irritation because I feel overwhelmed before my feet hit the floor. I'm looking at four unmade beds, a mound of laundry, a little work for a part-time job, a child who I should have registered for kindergarten (who is without a birth certificate and immunizations), making dinner for small group -- and those are on the big list before noon. That list doesn't include shower, groceries, exercise, and schoolwork (for Coop). Then, I take a quick look at Twitter and see a post from Jonathan McIntosh that says, "Set your gaze steadily on Jesus during holy week. Watch him love you to the uttermost." Some think the Gospel needs to be preached to those who do not know Christ (and it does). But, likewise, for Christ-followers, the Gospel has to be preached daily -- by others and ourselves -- to us. I have to be reminded of what I already know.

In this week of all weeks, the laundry can wait. The beds can wait. The immunizations can wait. The shower... well, I'll keep for the sake of others. I must set aside the trite for what has been set apart for me -- the death I deserved the die. He lived a life I could not live and died the death I deserved to die. Then, He rose victorious over the grave. Death, where is your sting? Hell, where is your victory?

How can I wake on Monday morning focused on myself and my schedule? I must set my gaze steadily on Jesus during this holy week.

Make Holy Week Holy to the Lord

Quick and Easy Dessert

There is one dessert that has stood the test of time at my house.  Chances are, if you ever make last minute plans to come to my house or make last minute plans to have me over and ask me to bring a dessert, you will have blondies.  My friend, Kari, gave this recipe to me years ago, and I cannot count the times I have used it.  When she passed it along, she commented that I would already have all of the ingredients.  If you make sure to keep chocolate chips in your house, you will too.


Blondies
Melt 1 stick butter
Add 2 C brown sugar
Add 2 eggs

I do not mix dry ingredients separately, but I stir them a little on top before mixing them in.


Add 1 1/2 C flour (I've started using whole wheat)
1 T baking powder
1 t salt
(I even added a scoop of ground flax seed this time around).
1 T vanilla


Stir in 1-1 1/2 C chocolate chips
For variety, you can use toffee chips, white chocolate chips, any variety or add nuts.


Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.  I bake mine for 25.

Christ from the O.T.

I'm at The Gospel Coalition Conference in Chicago this week hoping to retain even a portion of the knowledge being poured upon me.  Mostly, though, my hope is for the knowledge to penetrate the depths of my heart and so provoke change.  I am able to sit under the teachings of some of the greatest preachers of our time and what will be some of the greatest preachers of all time such as Tim Keller, D.A. Carson (brilliant), John Piper, Mark Dever, Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, Crawford Loritts and many others.

The topic for the week is Preaching Christ from the Old Testament.  Tim Keller preached from Exodus our first day here, and I want to add my notes from his sermon.  I will not come close to doing his sermon justice, not even in my notes, but there were a few key points, one in particular, that were pivotal for me.

Exodus 14:5

1.  Salvation is about getting out.  What are we getting out of?  Bondage with layers.  Even though the people were freed from Egypt, they still felt like slaves in their minds.  We wrestle the same the sin.  Keller said, "You can take the people out of slavery, but you can't take the slavery out of the people."  That's why we have been freed, are being freed and will be freed.  Sanctification is progressive.

2.  How do we get out?  Crossing over by grace.  The Israelites, in passing through the Red Sea left false masters on one side and crossed over to life.  We cross over from death to life.  Some probably walked through with confidence, some afraid.  You are not saved because of the quality of your faith but by the object of your faith.  That object being Christ.


3.  Why is it possible for us to get out?  The Israelites weren't any holier/better/righteous than the Egyptians.  They weren't freed because of who they were.  They had a mediator.  We have a mediator - Christ.


I love that I am not saved by the quality of my faith because it is definitely lacking and wavers day to day.  Thankfully, it relies only upon the Object of my faith.

Let's Talk About Sex -- to Babies

We started talking to our kids about sex extremely early.  Sarah is 9, Abby 7 and Cooper just turned 5.  They obviously know different things for each of their ages, but they probably know more than most kids their ages.  We have a few ways and reasons we have done this that I will share.


1.  Unless there is an unexpected question, Chris and I are both present to engage our children in the discussion.  While there will be a time for dad/son and mother/daughter discussions, for now, we want them to understand there is nothing private or embarrassing about what God has created and that we are not hiding anything from each other.  Another reason we both engage them in conversation is for future accountability.  If only I talk to the girls, they may feel they are free of accountability from their dad and vice versa.


2.  We want our kids to hear the truth from us before they hear a warped version at school.  At school, they may hear another parent's version, a friend's older sibling's version or what someone has seen in a movie.  We expect fully they will still hear those things, but hopefully, they will think back to what they were taught here for what is true.


3.  Sex will always be an enticing topic, but we believe teaching our kids here will take away some of the curiosity.  Maybe when it's news to everyone else, our kids will be bored with   trying to overhear lunchroom conversation.  Maybe they'll think my mom and dad talk about this at dinner all of the time.  :)


4.  One of the rules for our kids is that they can ask anything they want.  Anytime a question or curiosity arises, they can ask.  They can ask us anything BUT they may not talk to their friends about sex.  It is conversation for home.


A few more things...
We are not naive enough to think this will cover or take care of all issues we will face in elementary school with sex.  This is simply our way of dealing the best we know how.  Also, we have had some uncomfortable conversations.  We get crazy questions and comments!  We have also had some of our funniest talks with our kids by being open and honest about sex. They keep us laughing.  If only I could share something that was said yesterday, but it's too inappropriate to blog!


One of the resources we have used is called Facing the Facts, The Truth About Sex and You by Stan and Brenna Jones.  There are four books in the series covering different age ranges.

The Funniest People in My House

I started a blog this year because someone told me they can be published.  I'm not the best at keeping a journal.  I have notes throughout the house, I've started journals different times over the years in different notebooks and I have entries on my computer.  But, I thought this would be the best place to keep everything together for my kids -- pictures, events, memories, and even some of the funny or sweet things they've said.  So, I'm digging through drawers finding old quotes that I've jotted down, and I'll be adding to this post as I find memories I've scattered about.  The dates will be scattered about as well.

7.13.07
Sarah did not want to go to Mimi's tonight.  I told Sarah to tell her why when she came to pick them up.  Sarah told mom, "You know when you've been somewhere a lot and you don't want to go because you've been there so much..." Mom said, (kidding) "I don't understand."  Abby said, "She's not coming."  --Perfect example of their personalities.  Sarah trying to break it gently without hurting feelings while Abby is cutting to the chase.

12.30.07
We were watching Underdog tonight, and they said "butt."  Sarah said, "Ooh, they said the 'b' word." A few minutes later, they said stupid, and Abby said, "Ooh, they said the 'b' word."

1.8.08
Sarah's tummy has been hurting in the morning.  I told her mine and Chris's has been hurting too, and it's probably drainage.  She said, "maybe it's morning sickness."

Sarah's words '06
cazebo for gazebo
carchoal for charcoal

Abby's words '06
clowns for clouds

6.14.07
I tried to get Sarah to try on some pants at Old Navy and she said, "No, they're too sixy."  She wouldn't tell me where she heard it, but I think she got it confused with turning six yesterday.  She was prissy one night, and said again, "I don't know why I'm being so sixy."  I asked what that means, and she said, "You know, how you act when you turn six."

7.5.07
Last night, Sarah came in the den and said she had something important to tell us.  Before we went to bed, we went to her room.  She said she asked Jesus into her heart and asked if she could be baptized Sunday.  We asked her some questions.  She said she was telling Abby about going to heaven.  She prayed for Abby to go to heaven then asked Jesus into her heart.  She said, "when I finished, I was like 'okay' why did I just do that."  She said she wants a clean heart.  She wants to be baptized.  Her face was glowing, and she was smiling and so excited.  She said her heart felt "kindof different."

Abby said she didn't want to go to heaven.  She wants to stay home.  Sarah told her heaven is like going home.  She said it's like vacation but you get to stay forever.

9.26.09

Abby -- “Daddy, I think my booty just threw up.”

Cooper -- “I’m done, Suzanne.”  (on the potty)

Abby -- “Why do we have to put on clean underwear?  We always have to do that!”

10.13.09

Cooper just said that God will send a text to his heart.  Guess he knows those are two important things in our house.

10.26.09

Sarah was telling me about a competition at school today and about the ribbons everyone received.  She said blue was first place, red was second place, white was third place, and yellow meant “horrible.”  -- “honorable”

12.15.09

I was telling the kids this morning about Whitney being in Iraq and how we are going to send him a Christmas card since he has to be away from his family.  Abby said, “How did he get in a rock?”

Why We Live in the Burbs

Over the past few years, there has been much talk in The Church about the welfare of the city.  I have to admit that being a part of the The Church my entire life, I never heard these words uttered once until around 2008.  Sidebar: I live in the South, so it's no surprise that we're a little behind on things.  We're just now getting around to the "fix your own yogurt" craze.  A friend was just in town from D.C., and she said they've been topping their own yogurt for about 2 years.  So, I understand, the idea of engaging the city is not new, and yes, I'm fully aware of the Scriptural foundation.   I'm just stating that it did not come into my life until a few years ago.  By the time these ideas entered The Acuff household, we were living the full-blown suburban dream, okay, not really, but we live in the suburbs.  

We bought our first house in the city.  We had our first child.  We bought our second house in the city but closer to the suburbs and had our second child.  We had our third child and bought our third house in the suburbs.  Finally, we could settle in peace and raise our children in a safe neighborhood in the most highly sought after elementary school.  We were close to our church and church friends.  Safety. Comfort.  


About a year and a half after we moved into the suburbs, we began being exposed to the idea of moving back into the city for the sake of ministry.  We were hearing of people moving back into the city to live in areas of great brokenness and deep hurt, places that are the most concentrated areas of injustice and broken systems.  We tried to listen, and we tried not to listen.  It tugged at our hearts, and it offended our lifestyle.  We began listening to the hearts of those around us who had great wisdom in these matters, namely our friends Lisa and Matthew Watson.  We joined an association called www.ccda.org, read their literature and have since attended a local conference.  We have been greatly challenged by the teaching of John Perkins, Tim Keller, Bob Lupton and others on these matters.


So the next step is to put our house on the market and move back into the city, right?  Not exactly.  We have spent the last few years thinking hard, listening hard and praying hard over these matters.  We have not taken them lightly.  We have considered urban ministry to the fullest, even pursuing multiple job opportunities in urban ministry to no avail.  Our conclusion, at this point, is that God has us right where He wants us.


We no longer live in the suburbs with the same purpose.  We moved here for safety and comfort, but we're staying here on mission.  We have found a need to be an example of simplicity in the suburbs.  We have also had opportunities to help restore marriages and take food to hurting families.  We are finding ways to model the gospel to people who are greatly broken but highly skilled at covering it.  We seek ways to represent Christ in an area where church is the norm but the pursuit of Christ is not priority.


At the same time, we love the city of Memphis.  We care about the welfare of the city -- the people, the school system, the leaders.  We will not cease to be engaged in the work God has called us to in this community as well as the restoration He has called us to in the city.  There is certainly room for work in both places. We are called to live intentionally wherever we are.

Teaching What I (Don't) Believe

As I parent, I find I am often comforting my children with words that are even hard for me to understand and believe.  I know they are true, but I struggle to choke them down as I speak them.

Friday, I was taking my kids to spend the night with my parents.  I told them I would miss them and pledged to them that we could dream about each other.  Sarah, my oldest said she would rather not dream about me because her dreams about me usually involve me being killed by a serial killer.  I laughed awkwardly and told her that sounded awful, but I wasn't really shocked.  Our minds are capable of the most horrific and gruesome thoughts.  At the same time, I couldn't lie and tell her that was impossible.  I never want to give my kids the impression that I will always be here or that I can save them from danger.

The next night over dinner, Chris and I talked with our kids about God being a father to the fatherless and a mother to the motherless.  Chris told them about his dad leaving when he was in high school and how God has been his father.  He told them about other dads and coaches stepping in to help him.  We told them about our friend Terri who lost her mother to cancer and how much she misses her but that God also fills the void of mother.  We did not make an effort to tell them that we could be killed by a serial killer to prevent invoking fear, but we hope the truth was received without presenting that possibility as an example.  Our goal was to explain to our children that God is enough.  His grace is sufficient.  They nodded as if to understand, and we had them individually repeat, "God is enough."

I have to walk away from those lessons repeating to myself God is enough as if trying to convince a child - that child being me.  I tell my children God is enough yet I struggle to believe it myself.  It shows in the way I live.  If I believe He is enough would I expect people to validate me?  If I believe He is enough would I place my identity in my performance as a mother?  If I believe He is enough, why do I seek answers from the world instead of His Word?  If I believe He is enough, would I find less comfort in food?  If I believe He is enough, would I continue to believe I am the solution for fixing everyone's problems?

So, how can I teach my children things I struggle to believe?  Grace is my first answer.  Secondly, while I may struggle to believe truths of God, I believe God.  I believe Him at His Word.  My flesh and Spirit are at war, but He is enough whether I believe it or not.  This is another reason to teach things that I struggle with:
As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth:  It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.  Isaiah 55:10-11